At the age of 9, the unexpected request to fill in at a swimming competition, ended up having long term repercussions. The swimming club I’d been taking lessons with asked if I’d swim a length. I’d never swam in a competition before, nor did I have any particular wish to do so, however I borrowed a costume, donned a swimming cap and swam a length, winning by a mile in a surprisingly fast time. At seeing my potential, the adults around me, parents and swimming coaches decided that I should embark on regular training.
The next eight years my life became dedicated to training, competing, travelling while totally immersed in the sport of swimming.
Marguerite Manning says of Saturn in the 12th House it is “Childhood Lost”, an interesting concept to ponder with my personal experience. Was it lost or just heavily structured?
Stephen Arroyo reckons that wherever Saturn is in a Chart “One can experience, stability, deep satisfaction and meaning in life”
Dane Rudhyar commented that the 12th House “Is also potentially the field of fulfillment”and it certainly was.
During these years, I started my days early, pre -school training sessions began at 6 am, the big spacious Sports centre (Can a Sports Centre be classified as an institution?) with 4 floors, usually filled with the bustle of fitness, fun, echoes of voices, splashing and squeals of excitement was eerily quiet at this time of the day. The pool was an international one, massive floor to ceiling windows, with a huge seating arena. There was a deep blue diving pit and the smell of chlorine permeating the air. The Sun would rise and create mesmerizing patterns over the white tiles on the bottom of the pool, staring at the black line (funnily enough the colour of Saturn!) I’d go up and down the pool for hours a day, the rushing sound of water in my ears, goggles on, snatched bits of conversation between the training schedule, singing in my head as I swam, releasing angst and tension. With my Mars in Leo, it did fulfil a need to direct my pent up Fire in an active direction.
It was a solitary pursuit, a meditative sport, trance like, time to think things over, the competition between you and the timer, you and your muscles, you and your breath, you and your will to win, you and your ability to overcome pain.
Saturn in the Water House of Neptune!
There were many rules and regulations that were present within the sport which seeped into my personal life, restricted in what I could do or where I could go in order to prevent injury, illness or fatigue. My Mum liked me to be in bed early, as the kids in my neighbourhood were playing outside, I’d be lying in my room listening to the games and laughter, as I anticipated another early start pushing towards my goals of success.
Such was my youth growing up with Saturn, the ‘Lord of Karma’ in the ‘House of Karma’. Saturn, the strict authoritative disciplinarian breathing down my neck, thwarting, constricting, curtailing freedom, scolding and causing doubts and insecurities, rubbing my nose in situations I’d like to run away from but had the option to reluctantly face this time around.
The whisper of Saturn to do better, swim faster, asking questions such as had I trained hard enough? Was I going to vanquish my opponents? What time was I going to pull off?
During competitions each swimmer got points awarded for their performance which contribute to the whole teams overall score, being told if you won your race the whole team would come first was a taster of Saturn’s pressure, the establishment of reputation, commitment and a way to seek approval from my Father.
Success is a long game, paved with toil, sweat and tears, ambition is achieved with repetitive action of noteworthy discipline. Saturn.
These are, of course, benefits of Saturn that transmute the energy of the grueling lessons. Get down to business, put the training in, turn up, do the work, feel the pain, dot the ‘i’s’, cross the ‘t’s’, get your tax return completed, pay your bills and take on that responsibility you promised to honour. Then reap as you have sown.
Until our first Saturn return at around 28 – 29 years of age, we grapple with hard, cold and sometimes cruel lessons, rebelling against authority, obstacles and being yoked with responsibility, feeling constriction in the area of our Charts where it sits.
Then the first return hits and to some extent we fall, it brings us to our knees, floundering on the shaky ground we thought was so solid, until Saturn stomped on it. The stomp arrives in many forms, job loss, birth, divorce, marriage, death, business upset, illness, financial issues, affairs or turbulence in the home, but for sure it will be something that makes you sit up and take notice of your life and the values you once held so dear.
My Saturn return delivered a memorable combination of the death of an Aunt I was very close to, an ending of a job and starting a new business. Shock, loss, grief, endings and new beginnings.
When your world has stopped quaking and the dust settles from Saturn’s stomp, you can sit, breathe and reflect, it really is an invitation from Saturn to change the lay out of your land, smashing those walls down it helped to construct early on permits you to start again on a new course or gain assurance you need to tweak the one you are already on, it is an opportunity to review your plans, make adjustments and transmute the hurdles of the past into stepping stones of the present, leading to a solid foundation for the future.
Alan Oken remarks that Saturn “Forces the fulfillment of obligations…so that personal growth may occur”
The 12th House contains much mystery and richness, the House of Pisces, Ruled by Neptune & Jupiter, last stop of the Wheel, portal to Star Studded Galaxies and the Infinite Intelligence behind it all.
Is that why it is also known for restriction? Associated with guilt, anxiety because the bereft Space Cadet can’t find the right vehicle to transport them off and away.
Based on its Ruler Neptune, It is a Magical transcendent place, full of creativity, mysticism, healing, there are gateways to the World of Spirit, Space, the Cosmic Highway that goes on for all Eternity, a House where you can get close to the Divine, exploring Its Spark within you, indeed a House of the Unseen, that which is out of view, hidden, the Occult.
It is a House where boundaries do not exist, where freedom is sought to become One with the All, on Earth or off it, fantastic visions enrapturing the Soul.
However, when things go askew, it can become a region of smoke and mirrors, revealing disappointment, illusion, disillusion, leading to confusion, driving the idealist to seek escape from, or join with, fantasy and delusion via drugs, alcohol or mental diffusion.
The 12th House may find a person seeking solitude to focus on the connection with Mysticism and their Spiritual vision or to withdraw from the overwhelm of life.
In the case of Jupiter Rule the aspirations of the 9th House fall beneath the radar in the 12th, Unconscious searching for meaning, opening Heart and Soul to a higher purpose, altruism, expansion, benevolent and malevolent effects are found under its influence and aspects it makes to other Planets, In this House of Solitude and introspection philosophy, teaching, sharing ideas, law and foreign connections all come into consideration in a private, self contained or frustrated manner.
In early life Saturn may constrict the qualities indicated by the sign and House it is in or make them seem absent, even frowned upon, but when Saturn is befriended by the individual it becomes a steadfast accomplice giving support for building that which was denied early on, helping others overcome what seemed like oppression to construct a new way and ultimately finding fulfillment.
As the House of Pisces, the Energy flowing through is that of wanting to help others, pouring compassion and kindness into the world, to sit under a tree and make daisy chains while Chanting to the Great Spirit. The idealistic Pisces dream wants every Being to be happy, for humanity to just get along, as it is so obvious how this can be achieved. Don’t hurt other people, animals or Earth, see and be the good, Love will conquer all….
And then reality strikes, Love gets trampled on, kindness is mistaken for weakness, people cause pain and hurt, take advantage of empathy. Despair hits as they witness the vile, unkind, cruel, savage, psychotic behaviour of fellow Earth dwellers, the sorrow, self undoing and need to escape can be captured right there, feeling victimized, torn, tortured, a martyr naively carrying on bearing the scars inflicted by spiteful others thinking that if you Love them they will change and see the error of their ways, oh dear, no here we find the unexpected and oft hidden enemies.
One of my constant lessons this time as I consider the Karmic influence of Saturn in the 12th House is stopping thinking people want to be better and find their Spiritual Joy, after spending many years of seeking deep Soul expanding conversations about the meaning of it all and trying to coax people into taking the most delightful trip into their Inner Universe, being met with rolling eyes and yawning disinterest it finally got through to me, people want to have a laugh, get sozzled and high, not to sit in a Stone Circle doing Ritual to see Angels, Spirit and travel the Astral Planes and it was OK, I just had to find people that did!
It is understandable I chose to be born into a family whose Spiritual pursuits were down the list, taking into account how my Spiritual thoughts and activities had got me into dire trouble in previous life.
Thankfully, I was introduced to the ‘Occult’ when I was 13 by a friend at school, she was an Astrologer and opened the door to wonders of the World of Stars, Planets and their effect on sentient Beings, another friend introduced me to Tarot and Magic. When I was swimming, my head was full of Neptunian ideas and vast endless Oceans of images, questions and possibilities swelled within me.
How Blessed I feel as my second Saturn return looms to still hold such illuminating enthusiasm for all of the Mysteries today.
Having a Pisces Ascendant, Venus in Pisces and Saturn (in Aquarius) in the 12th House serves me beautifully regarding my consistent devotion to knowing myself and assisting others in knowing themselves. The responsibility to people who seek my guidance is ever present,
It never stops, the exploration, reading, meditation, courses, teaching, workshops, sharing, curiosity, the marvel at what is possible if we only apply ourselves.
My lifelong career Path has and continues to be utilizing healing Energy with the body, through the mind, emotions and Spirit. In Spa’s, Retreats and places of calm serenity, in quiet blessed rooms, out of harm’s way, people come for guidance, answers uplift, assurance, balance, harmony, hope, peace and Unconditional Love.
What has been overlooked I endeavour to find and reveal to them, hidden talents brought into consciousness, encouraging the erection of boundaries and finding the King or Queendom of Self, where no-one is allowed without permission.
In the Neptune, Jupiter, Pisces House Saturn is now life enhancing, giving structure and order within the nebulous sparkly mist that can descend, giving me a prod when I am tempted to stop and gaze at the endless seascape for days on end, practicality and action drives the Spiritual Journey, discipline to study, research, practice and share what I learn.
The horrors of people and their actions, deeds of those who have wandered far away from the Spiritual Path and are capable of such tragic evil fester on Earth, but the curse of Hope and Optimism remains all powerful within my Soul.
Even though it is hugely challenging, Marguerite Manning’s comment that Saturn in the 12th House teaches “Unconditional Faith”, becomes a beacon of Divine Light, shining from beyond, where Spirit is aligned with Love, wrapping me in comfort, visions of those who know, who went before us achieving and Mastering Ancient Knowledge, we have the opportunity to follow in their enlightened Wisdom.
Diane Cox March 2020