This discussion between Zenta Malan and Diane Cox is an introduction on how women become sensually and sexually engaged.
Oh Uranus, rebellious, innovative, eccentric, ingenious Uranus, sending it’s lightning bolts of sudden and unexpected change, what mayhem can you bring so we can pull order from it?
When Uranus approached my first house, which contains my Aries Sun and Aries Mercury, I thought,
“Hmph, let’s see what you’ve got Uranus, what change are you going to bring to my identity, personality and the way I shine my Light on the World, how will you electrify the way I communicate or completely change it?”
Resistance is futile, whether you like it or not, change is coming, so you better buckle up and try to be open minded when Uranus arrives…or be sucked up into a tornado of chaos and shock.
Life was pretty stable as Uranus crept closer, I was in a long term relationship, which was fraying around the edges, business was good, well established and enjoying a reliable reputation, my dance classes were busy and the Think Tank Workshops a friend of mine and I were putting on got great reviews. The social and professional status earned over the years was enjoyable and solid.
All the family lived in the same city and having lunch and coffee with them was regular and important. Treasure from close friendship was ever cherished and sharing curry after work, laughing, discussing the latest conspiracy conference we’d been to was memorable, delicious Soul food.
What was Uranus going to do to this cosy, productive life of mine? Bring it on Uranus, Bring it on.
The first Uranian lightning bolt hit early 2011 as Uranus passed over my Pisces Ascendant on its way to Aries and my first house.
It had been a busy day, my then boyfriend had moved in, we’d lived in our own homes for most of our relationship as it worked for us, but he’d got himself into a pickle with his finances and had to leave. While he was downstairs making tea, his phone went off next to me on the bed, I never looked at his phone but this time I was idly curious who was texting him.
The message was from his best male friend asking my boyfriend not to finish this relationship they had as he was the Love of his life, his Soulmate. I must have read that message a hundred times in one minute. Adrenalin flooded my body and I sat in shocked disbelief for a while. Wow, my boyfriend of 17 years was gay and he’d been having a secret affair with his best mate. Knowing his best mate I just couldn’t accept the idea and as is normal, my mind raced all over the place trying to find other explanations. One soon emerged.
Over previous months, he’d formed a friendship with a woman, in response to me forming a friendship with a man who I shared an allotment with. As much as I loved this guys company, our friendship was intensely cerebral, he gave me sparking Spiritual and Mental stimulation that was seriously lacking in my relationship, the boyfriend was convinced we were having an affair, which was understandable because I would skimp on the truth of where I was, as he flipped his lid when I went digging for too long, on retrospect it was a classic projection, as he actually was having an affair.
The second bolt struck the morning after, he confessed during the night he’d been “going for walks” with this woman, but “nothing has happened”. The fact that he hid this woman’s number under the name of his best friend just didn’t tally up with his words.
“Pack you bags and leave” said I.
He didn’t, wouldn’t, unable to face and take responsibility for his actions. I was a convenient stepping stone. He dragged his ass around trying to pretend nothing had happened for months after evidently telling his squeeze it was over.
OK Uranus, that is an attention grabbing beginning. I’m impressed as I didn’t see that coming at all.
I was so focused on what it would do in my first House, I’d neglected to consider what the echoes in the 7th would be. Silly me.
The third bolt struck in slow motion and had far reaching effects.
In the midst of the crumbling relationship, work and spinning a number of other plates, I had an invitation to join a Global Secret Solstice Giving Event, like a Secret Santa but based on the Solstice Celebration. People anonymously picked names off a list and sent a stranger a gift in order to become friends and generate warm networks around the Planet. This is not normally my sort of thing, as time and space already seemed in short supply and I didn’t need another plate to spin.
However, the invitation was accepted. The list arrived populated with a bunch of names, glancing over them, nothing stood out or grabbed my attention until I got to a certain name which danced around the page and had fireworks coming off it. It was a mans name and I thought, the last thing I need is a male friend after what is currently transpiring, so I carried on my search. But every one of my Spiritual Entourage screamed at me “Go Back!” Nah, I thought, not getting involved with a man on any level.
“Go Back! They insisted “You MUST listen to us, go back and tune in”
One of the many things life has taught me is to listen closely to my instinct, so I did. Backtracking, the name appeared again, tuning in resulted in butterflies fluttering around inside me
“Oh what harm can it do? He lives on the other side of the World” and with that, I picked him, sent off my choice and started to decide what gift to send. The organiser suggested we found our chosen recipient on social media to suit the gift we were sending to the person. I logged on to one of my pages and saw a friend request from the very same man I had just picked off the list. Weird didn’t even come close. I couldn’t work out the spooky coincidence. How come he had sent me a request, how did he know I even existed? After confirming the request I privately observed his page, weighing him up from afar.
Life went on, but things were changing, work and classes were quieter, the relationship limped on with the boyfriends refusal to end it and leave.
Just before the December Winter Solstice a package arrived for me….from the not so anonymous potential friend from the Gift Giving list. I rubbed my head for a long time trying to work out, how and why the bloke I picked sent ME a gift?
I sent him a Thank You message via social media and I eventually found out he had picked me off the anonymous list the same day, at the same hour…the ball began to roll as public messages became private and more personal.
He was an inundation to my parched river beds.
After Christmas, almost a year sine the reveling text message, I told the boyfriend again in no uncertain terms that he had to find himself another place to live, he was fragile, good at being the victim, but I drove him around the streets looking for somewhere to rent, eventually he found a place and left at last.
Having my home back to myself allowed me to spend numerous hours in cyberspace talking to the man I had befriended. He was intense, unusual, highly intelligent and focused. Cupid elevated me with Arrows of Love.
He flew to England to meet me and my family in person, which produced a fourth unexpected bolt from Uranus, he was fearless against their demands and expectations, knowing with astonishing perception the life long undercurrents at play, which he rejected on his and my behalf. Waves began to wash away some very old patterns.
Very soon after this the serious discussions began, how were we going to be able to be together? I lived in a city in the middle of England, he lived by the sea, surrounded by mountains in sunny and beautiful Cape Town.
The deconstruction began, as Uranus sent ripples ahead to my Mercury I was communicating a message that I thought I would never be saying anytime in my life, to my clients, dance students, friends and family.
“I am leaving! I’m going on an adventure to be with this incredible Being”
I moved very quickly, it was totally unexpected by the majority, who saw my words, actions as ‘out of character’ , Uranus will do that to your Sun, affecting everyone who has a take on the way you are, it wobbles the status quo.
Nine months after choosing his name off that list I was flying away from my life and all that was familiar, to a complete unknown, I knew nothing of the country or city, had no friends or connections.
Uranus, I applaud you, I could never have imagined in a million years that this is what you had up your sleeve.
At the same time Uranus was whirling through my 1st House, Pluto was slinking through my 10th, transforming my reputation, social status, career and ambitions. More than one person said I was having a mid life crisis and would be back by Christmas. A friend of mine who is an Astrologer begged me not to go as I was having a Uranus Transit and when it was over she said I’d be thinking WTF just happened and be on a plane back to England.
Well the transit is over, Uranus has crackled its way through my 1st House and is now causing mayhem for those who have a presence of Taurus in their Charts.
I am still here, dazed, renewed and not confused.
There are a number of events I could write about that happened in the past six years, however the most noticeable ones regarding the subject matter are, my slate was wiped clean, no-one knew me, who I was, what I did, yes my identity was erased on one level. This allowed me to re-invent myself, a new beginning, new pursuits and no preconceived idea from myself or others around me.
There is no doubt that people saw my act of Self Love as utter rebellion, My Mum still asks me regularly if and when I am coming back home. It is evident I had to move thousands of miles away to break the hold of certain familial habits.
The life long pleaser in me began to take a back seat and I learned to say ‘No’ even more.
The extraordinary Being I dropped everything to be with is a science, engineer type with a fascination for tech and radio waves, all Uranian type activities, you couldn’t make it up!
I finally had the time and space to concentrate on my love of Astrology and started a new business guiding people with this Ancient Knowledge.
My Artistic leanings took on a whole new direction as I wriggled out of previous judgements and constraints.
Did Uranus influence Mercury in how I communicated with my friends abroad and keep connected via the science and tech of Skype and Social Media? Probably.
Being free from routines and responsibilities was surprising, new found freedoms sprung forth within my own revolution.
I remember sleeping for weeks when I arrived in Cape Town, every time I sat still for a moment I’d nod off, at the time unknowingly exhausted from spinning all those albeit pleasant plates
Walking along the beach on my way back from the shops, stopping to watch strange molluscs create their art, constantly reminds me, as if I need it, that I got to realise my Dream, living by the Sea, without a schedule or a clock to watch, painting, relaxing, finding myself again, reconstructing identity, purpose and meaning. There are fundamental aspects of us that remain, the Goddess and God given gifts innate to our Being. I continue to use them in different ways, towards the same end.
I think about the bad advice my Astrologer friend gave me, not to do what I have done, to try and avoid the inevitable. She was wrong and afraid, probably that Uranus would come and upset her own apple cart.
The Uranus Transit through my 1st House, which contains my Sun and Mercury, forever changed me and my life. I am not the person I was, it razed my old ways to the ground and built something I never thought possible, making me take the leap of faith to create something astounding and beautiful was deeply challenging and utterly exhilarating.
I wish you all the best with yours!
My book Pig Farmers and Prima Donnas is available on Amazon, Kindle Version.
It is understandable that people don’t believe in Ghosts, if you have never seen, heard or felt a ‘Ghost’ well of course you are not going to believe. The less you believe the less chance there is of connecting with Energy that hasn’t got a physical body. Then again numerous men and women run a mile at the thought of a connection from ‘behind the Veil’.
There is no question of ‘belief’ for those who have had regular interaction with Essences of Spirit. Seeing, hearing, feeling those that live in the Unseen Realms is a notable experience, adrenalin surges, eyes widen, the heart flutters, it can even bring on a squeal. To acknowledge their presence by asking what they want is a simple polite response to their oft unannounced arrival.
“Oh hello, yes I know you are there listening, how can I help you?”
Ghosts or Energy Forms gravitate to those who are open to the realism that they exist, people born in touch with a wide range of frequencies that can pick up the refined resonance of those existing in realms invisible to most Humans, once the rules and safety parameters are understood, communication can be established.
This all being said, there are some things that need to be controlled very tightly, I for one would never use a Ouija Board as they seem to be portals for more unruly Spirits and Tricksters waiting for an opportunity to dive in and cause havoc. Protection, Knowledge, Experience and Maturity are vital in all these matters.
What follows is a true story, experienced by myself and six other adults over a period of a few years.
Five of us shared a house, an end of terrace with lots of windows, a garden and an easy relaxed feel to it. Children played outside, riding their bikes up and down the street while dogs ran around after them. A family area popular for schools, shops, close to the city centre and definitely not an area known for being built on an old Ancient burial site!
Walking through the front door, through a porch, you took a left turn into the open plan kitchen and dining room, a big patio door in the dining room led to the garden, the lounge was also off the dining room, a strange cul-de-sac lounge, a dead end to the house, just one door, a very high ceiling with one window that looked over the garden and another set about 8 feet up, the only thing you could see through it was the sky and one of the bedroom windows..
Sitting in the dead end lounge could be unsettling, too many horror films had dead end rooms like this, a trap, no way out from an axe wielding, unhinged nutter who could be approaching quickly. One way in and one way out
However, luckily the story I am about to tell relies on no medieval weapons or mental illness.
It began one evening as we sat in dimmed lighting watching some mediocre film, idly glancing up out of the high window, the inky blue sky gazed back. My bedroom window blended in with the darkness and silhouettes of rooftops reached up making angular shapes. Feeling relaxed and content in the cosy warmth. my attention returned to my friends and the television.
Attempting to focus on the film again, where the plot wasn’t thickening, I found myself getting fidgety and bored, too easy to guess the outcome and terrible dialogue. The low lighting meant reading wasn’t an option so reverted to the only decent thing to do at times like these, make some tea.
Standing up to have a good long stretch, I naturally looked up at the ceiling and out of the high window towards the sky, again, something was different, a large patch of yellow was in the middle of my view as I took in the curious sight of my bedroom lights now being on. No-one had left the room and the house was empty and all the people who were in happened to be in this lounge. Had someone sneaked in and accidentally knocked the dimmer switch as they snooped around my things?
“Hey! The lights in my bedroom are on” I announced to everyone,
“Eh?”someone uttered as heads turned away from the tv.
“The light in your bedroom is on? You must have left them on and forgot” Sarah said
“Nah, I was looking out of that window 10 minutes ago at the sky and it definitely wasn’t on”
“Shit, someone has broken in while we’ve been watching tv”
All four film watchers got up and gathered to have a look.
“Can you see any movement?” asked Martin
We all stared for a few seconds.
“Listen!’ can anyone hear anything?
Holding our breath we all strained to hear draws being opened, doors of the wardrobe or footsteps, nothing, no sounds at all.
“Fuck, Will, are you up for a stampede? What have we got to arm ourselves with?” said Martin
“Cheeky bastard, low life scumbag, should we go slowly and stealthy or charge? We’ll surprise him, be careful mate, he could be armed or have a knife”
The two men sprang into action, Goddess Bless them, fearlessly bolting up the stairs, shouting as they went. Us women stayed downstairs waiting for the sound of screams and banging as the burglar was apprehended. None came.
Two minutes later they both came down looking puzzled.
“Can’t see anything, we looked around your room, and all the others, saw nothing, thank God, probably a glitch or some electrical surge, we switched the lights off, phew that was a rush”.
Satisfied with the answer, we all settled down and carried on watching the rubbish film, waiting for our pulses and adrenalin levels to return to normal.
Ten minutes later the lights in the bedroom were on again.
“Aargh! The lights are on again!” Sophie squealed
“You have got to be kidding….”
We all got up, rushed to the window and peered through at the unexpected yellow glow,
“What the hell?”said Martin, “That’s so weird, if there was a surge we’d have seen the light bulbs dip or something and why would there be a surge…we don’t get surges”
“There can’t be anything up there, but we need to check again, we’ll all go”
Tentatively Sarah, Sophie and I crept up the stairs, behind Martin and William, who this time were armed with tennis racquets.
Our giggling exposed our nervousness as we held onto each other climbing the stairs.
“Sssshhhhhhh….” Sara said loudly
Bumping into each other we stopped before the landing, listening for noises,
“Can you see anything Mart?”
“Not sure yet, everyone listen!”
We all held our breath and listened, there was only silence. Martin and Will nudged the bedroom door open an inch, the light was still on, the room was empty, but it felt like something was present which made my stomach flip. A loud bang from behind us caused a chorus of screams, launching at the light switch, a single tap turned them off, we scrambled down the stairs, shrieking then laughing and truly spooked.
The light switches in my bedroom were dimmers, a single tap from your fingertip turned the lights on or off, if you kept your finger on the dimmer the lights slowly brightened or darkened, allowing you to create the perfect mood.
We were all rather confused about this mystery illumination.Two electricity surges that turned the lights on…just in the one room, with no other signs in the house? And as Martin said “We don’t get surges”.
During the following months, the bedroom lights kept turning on by themselves, one second they were off and the next they were on, we all witnessed it. Most of us got more reluctant to go and turn them off, not wanting to sense the eerie feeling on the landing and the hairs on the back of your neck stand on end.
We became intensely aware of the light situation in my bedroom, often looking up to check the status, one evening Sophie was staring into space and gasped
“Oh my God, Oh my God….I just saw the lights slowly turned on, as if someone had their finger resting on the dimmer switch, not a quick tap for instant light, but a slow brighten, what is up there doing that? I am NOT taking a look.”.
There was no-one in physical form upstairs at the time, we had all been downstairs when the lights came on.
It was freaky and I had o sleep in there every night.
Then other things started to happen.
In their peripheral vision Housemates saw swift moving Shadows travelling across the dining room or was it a trick of the light? No-one had mentioned it until a friend dropped by to have tea, sitting in the dining room he became alarmed by the sighting of something dashing by,
“Fuck! I’ve just seen something run across the room, I really did, It was like a small walking Shadow, what the fuck was that? Bloody hell!”.
“Oh thank goodness you have seen it, glad it’s not just me, yes, we have some mysterious things going on here, I am so relieved you have seen it, even though it is a bit unnerving at first”
Sarah was also sensitive to this Shadow. We both saw it around the house, out the corner of our eye. It was seen through the crack of the lounge door when it was open, favouring the kitchen and dining area, it was never seen upstairs.
We began to speak to it…after setting up protective candles, incense and playing chanting tracks.
“Hello, I know you are here and want to be noticed, I am open to listening to what you want”
Motionless, the Energy seemed to linger, maybe surprised at being addressed, weighing up our words, but no response came.
On occasions unusual sounds could be heard upstairs, not the wood cooling down or floorboards settling after the day kind of sounds but doors would open and a palpable sense of being stared at prevailed. Martin got fed up with the feeling on edge all the time and moved out.
My psychic friends would come around and comment there was a Spirit Energy around who wasn’t very happy, but it refused to communicate.
The activity started to accelerate, during the night my boyfriend Steve and I would wake up with the lights on, we’d lie there for a while building up the courage to run to the switch to tap them off again before returning quickly to the safety of the duvet, an hour later they would be on again. The switch was tried and tested, all was working perfectly. This went on for months, being woken up in the early hours with the lights glaring over the bed.
The presence roamed around the room one night in the dark, eventually waking me up, lying there, with adrenalin pumping, I asked again:
“Look, this isn’t a very relaxing way to go about things, what do you want? Just communicate in a way I’ll understand and let us see what we can do”
A few days later we were in bed, Steve was fast asleep, I stirred and turned over, as I did so the bedroom lights slowly brightened, as if a finger was resting on the switch, until the room was fully lit. I peeked over my duvet, to see who or what was standing at the light waking me up at this hour of the night? The clock glowed 3am.
“Yes, you are very clever, but it isn’t funny, I’ve asked you nicely” I responded from under the duvet until I shook my boyfriend awake so he could switch the lights off .
Lying awake, staring at shadows, I tried to calm myself down by breathing deeply, surrounding myself with protective Energy and tuning into my intuition. What did it want?
This slow brightening during the middle of the night became a regular occurrence.
About a month later after we had been watching funny animals on tv, to get us in a relaxed state for sleep, I eventually fell into a deep satisfying slumber. At 3.40am something began to disturb my peace, that adrenalin feeling, anxious sweating and a creeping sense of unease awoke me, I listened and then begrudgingly squinted at what was going on.
The lights were going mental, mad erratic flicking on and off as if someone were drumming all ten fingertips on the dimmer switch, rapid fire light pulses bounced off the walls and ceiling, they a furious feel
I squealed, heart hammering against my chest, horrified, confused looking at the frenzy above my head,
“Steve!” I yelled, as he was snoring next to me, he woke up to see the lights wildly flashing above his head,
“What the fuck…?” he said and sat taking the sight in for a few seconds before jumping out of bed and tapping the lights off and then on again, where they returned to normal. He stood tapping the dimmer in every way he could to replicate what he’d just seen and couldn’t.
“What the hell is going on?” he said,
“Jeez, that was so scary, how long were they doing that for?”
“I am shaking, that really gave me a fright, not sure how long, I woke up and they were going mad”
“It gave me a fright too, jeez, look at my hands” he held his shaky hands out for me to see
After calming down and gathering our wits about us, we tried to go back to sleep, Steve was out within a minute but I stayed awake, alert and afraid.
Pulling the duvet up to the bridge of my nose, I peered out into the bedroom. My heart continued to race with adrenalin fight or flight, which reaction was natural to me? Well, I was still here in the room, so a fighter I must be…The train of thought was a welcomed distraction, I rolled over to cuddle up to Steve, turning my back would be good defence to all that crazy vibe, the contact felt comforting and safe.
Trying to concentrate on getting back to sleep proved troublesome, yet bit by bit the adrenalin ebbed away, brain fuzziness approached, shock began to subside and that drifting sleepy sensation came closer.
I got jolted awake again by a very firm and decisive shove to my butt. It was as if I’d been kicked in the arse. The whole bed rocked, Steve jumped up saying:
“What the fuck was that? The bed is rocking, what the fuck is going on?”
“I have just been kicked in the arse by a ghost” I replied
“You just kicked me in the arse! For Fuck’s sake, you have got to be kidding! This has GOT TO STOP.” I shouted into the darkness.
Obviously I didn’t get anymore sleep that night and vowed to do some in depth investigation, I kept asking it to let me know and to communicate in a way that I understood what it wanted and what was it so pissed off about.
The next day was dedicated to finding out more about the history of the house, previous owners and tenants.
Asking around the neighbours it didn’t take long to join the dots. I don’t know why I hadn’t done this sooner, but no-one likes talking about what has gone on before in a home if it is disturbing.
The truth came out via hushed tones. It is not the kind of information you give to potential buyers or tenants, that the previous owner, Betty, had fallen down the stairs and subsequently died on the spot from her injuries. The property agents and her Son had thought better of revealing the facts behind the reason the house was up for rent or sale.
All the pennies dropped into place knowing this information. Evidently I had moved into Betty’s room and the Spirit Essence of Betty didn’t realize she didn’t live there anymore and the room wasn’t hers, the sudden jolt out of her body with the accident had meant she was a bit confused as to why these two people were in her bedroom. The Spirit Essence of Betty was angry and irritated that others were in her house, especially in her bedroom, she wanted us out.
My psychic friends came around again and we began speaking to Betty, telling her what had happened and the resulting intermingling of Energies, the different realms overlapping temporarily before she moved on. We did a ceremony to release Betty, sending her home to Divine Astral Light. The atmosphere in the house immediately changed, as the weeks went by, everything calmed down and returned to normal, Betty was finally at Peace and so were we!
Pig Farmers and Prima Donnas Book by Diane Cox Available on Amazon
Imagine the Fiery God of War, Mars, blazing, big and bold, loaded with weapons, full of desire and wanting to do the wild thing.
If you have a positively aspected Mars that will sound exciting, if you have heavy Saturn you’ll roll your eyes and still wonder what all that fuss is about…unless of course you’ve found all that desire for control and structure had led you down a satisfying path of BDSM, (Bondage, Submission, Saddo-Masochism) and all its variations.
Mars in Astrology is related to drive, motivation, energy, how you approach your battles in life, dance, play sports, dig your garden and approach sexual.passion.
Whereas Venus is about seduction and romance, Mars is concerned with the actual getting it on. Most people like the priming that Venus brings, to be seduced and stimulated, it prepares the boudoir for a satisfying roll around under or on top of the covers.
The placing of Mars could reveal unexpected surprises, holding a different character altogether from the rest of the Birth Chart. Your partner may have lots of Pisces in their Chart and be nascent, easy going, dreamy and happy on their turquoise cloud of Bliss, then you discover they have Mars in Aries, which will have made itself apparent from the start if you were paying attention, and this creative, wispy, nebulous character suddenly wants rapid, quick fire sex, hot, determined, heart racing, sweat inducing, ‘Do it like you mean it’ kind of sex…and a lot of it!
Understanding your Lover’s sexual drive from an Astrological point of view can help explain a few things, their perversions, disinterest, or obsession!
Mars is just one aspect of a Birth Chart and there are numerous other factors that will strengthen or dilute its general affect. It is one of the pieces of an extraordinary puzzle.
Here are some suggestions regarding how Mars may manifest its horny nature through the Signs…
Mars in Aries – Will enjoy dynamic, energetic sex, up against a wall, on the staircase, kitchen counter, over the bonnet of a car, joining the mile high club. They will like it before breakfast, after lunch and with dinner.
Foreplay will be minimal with the goal in mind, once they are spent and they’ve had a nap, they will already be thinking about the next bump and grind ahead.
Mars in Taurus – Sensual, sophisticated sexual approach, wining and dining is part of the seduction. They can be a bit lazy when it come to being the activator. Lots of stroking, kissing the neck and creating the right atmosphere for a slow burn, there is no hurry, may like some outdoor action and be a little attached to the same routine.
Mars in Gemini – Like to keep their hands busy, they will have lots of ideas and may enjoy telling you how much they like what you are doing or what they want you to do next and they’ll be happy if you reciprocate such information. Interlace fingers while in the midst of passion, graze their shoulders with your teeth. It may not last very long, their minds will be thinking about what’s next on the days agenda.
Mars in Cancer – You’d think this would be the perfect sign for the food sex combination, playing roll the grape, see where it lands and nibble it up from wherever it is, or licking ice cold white chocolate liqueur off the body. Their perception knows what their partner likes, but what about them, crafty crabs can be changeable, they enjoy emotional loving sex, close, warm and cosy…until they coax you into the back of their dark cave one night and you get to experience what surprises they have up those pincers!
Mars in Leo – Let them know how much they turn you on, if they walk across the room naked, look at them with admiration, they will roar with delight during good sex, appreciating lively, liberating, frequent bouts. They seek to satisfy you like you never been satisfied before and expect the same dedication from their Lover. They will get pleasure from you complimenting them on their prowess.
Mars in Virgo – Can be fastidious, make it clean, wash before and after. They may find it difficult to relax and can have a tendency to analyze sensations staying in their head too much. However, they can be very sensual with a desire to do a good job, a perfect job in fact, no pressure then. Sex can be seen as ‘functional’, tell them the huge health benefits of sex and they will get even more out of it.
Mars in Libra – Can you have refined, beautiful sex? If you have Mars in Libra most definitely. Along with luxury lingerie or heady aftershave, they will eventually understand bashfully, that they can rely on their good looks to do the trick, sex is great because they are gorgeous, sex is great because they are the catch so many others desire. Easily pleased in bed and touched by those who are just so damn grateful to be there.
Mars in Scorpio – Power, control, booze fuelled sessions involving bruises and possible blood loss. Or celibacy. You find a weird conundrum going on with Mars here, the need for Soul to Soul, intense sexual exchange is present, however their own need to be in control and hold the power in the bedroom can reveal itself in denial of the others pleasure. If that is sorted it is no holds barred in the sexual arena, I want to make you beg for more, how far will you go and what taboos will you explore in the clutch of a Mars Scorpio Being?
Mars in Sagittarius – Adventurous sex! There are different levels of what people consider to be ‘adventurous’ mind you, it may be Sex on a train, in a cave, while your Mother is talking to you on the phone, in a field of sunflowers or on a dinghy out at sea. Suggesting new places or ideas for sex will be a turn on, this will invigorate their ardour. Paying some attention to thighs and knees could bring make them tingle.
Mars in Capricorn – Cool, remote Saturn meets Mars. Tight control on sexual drives, doesn’t let sex control them, they choose when, where, how and frequency and not much can sway them from their need to be the authority figure calling the shots and making the sexual rules in a relationship. This is why Mars in Capricorn could get a thrill out of bondage and S&M. When the Goat does let loose it can be an earthy, persistent, productive pounding.
Mars in Aquarius – Kinky, unusual sexual appetites. They appreciate the unexpected, use a blindfold, tantalize their minds with an array of sensory input, take them by surprise, tie them to a chair and spank them with a table spoon. Have sex with a strobe light on, (as long as they don’t have epilepsy), or write secret sexy messages on your body with a UV pen and get it on under a UV light where words of what to do where come into vision.
Mars in Pisces – Sex is usually conducted with the whole Universe, romance is important, as is sensitivity to their dreamy gentle nature, they will see healing visions and cities from the outer Cosmos if you are pushing the right buttons. You are the magical wonderful creature taking them on that pleasure Journey and they Love you for that. They would like sexy showers, Oceanic sex, under warm tropical rain on a paradise island and a skillful toe suck would go down well now and again.
So when you look at your Mars and that of your partner, you may see why the fires burn bright or why the hearth is barely warm. Different strokes for different folks.
There is much work to be done if you have Mars in fiery Aries and the water of Mars in Cancer comes to douse it right down! There are many ways to please one person and then the other because Mars in Cancer will never deliver the hot, hard frequent sexual encounters that Aries seeks. Compromise is needed.
Add to Mars, the placing of Venus (covered in my previous post) and factor in not only other Astrological indicators but observed behaviour and messages around sex when growing up.
Communication is the key, everybody is so quick to state what they don’t like or want, however, a relationship gets even more interesting when someone has the courage to state what they actually DO want, even though it may raise a few eyebrows and shed a whole new light on your dearly beloved.
Seduce and Love your Lover impressively by understanding what makes them tick in the romance arena, feeling loved will keep any relationship together and these tips give you some sign posts of how to give your significant others what they need to feel appreciated.
If you don’t already know, you can find out where Venus is in your Astrological Birth Chart here
Astrology is an Ancient Art and is immensely helpful in understanding your Lover, boss, colleagues, friends, enemies and kids. Highlighting themes, personality traits, career paths, material interest, romance and compatibility.
VENUS – Goddess of Love and Beauty, Romance…and in Astrology connected to friends, social circles, Art, Music, yummy food and luxury of all kinds.
The position of Venus in your Chart gives an indication of how you like to be ‘Loved’, it shows what your partner needs to do in order for you to feel Loved and appreciated and it tells you what your partner likes, it is a fantastic way of being able to work out how to show your nearest and dearest that you really do care.
In relationships people often do to their partners what they’d like done to them, someone may like to go on a romantic Moon Lit walk to feel loved and appreciated whereas their partner feels having a meal cooked for them is just the bees knees of romance. A person may be a Capricorn, ruled by conservative Saturn and yet have Venus in Leo, which really brings a desire for attention, fun and having a goof laugh.
Venus can make numerous connections to other signs and planets affecting how it gets expressed, what is written below is an overview of the many ways Venus likes to be loved.
Venus in Aries – These people will like doing things for the first time, something you haven’t done with previous Lovers, something daring and adventurous. Book them in on a battle enactment for an anniversary celebration, do a dual bungee jump together or drum around a spectacular bonfire.
On a daily basis, these folks will appreciate loyalty, your active presence and open, direct communication and doing spontaneous trips.
Venus in Taurus – Here we find Venus at home, as Ruler of Taurus, and we are talking tangible, tasty ways of feeling Loved. Take your partner away to a sumptuous getaway, fine dining, good wine and sensual after play. Buy them something they can wear or use, not like a cheese grater though! Something more like a hand crafted stylish pen or a piece of jewellery.
On a daily basis these folks will appreciate little gifts, flowers, a magazine wine and not being bossed about.
Venus in Gemini – Talk to them, make them laugh or more importantly let them make you laugh! Give them lots to think about and keep them busy, stimulate their minds, take them to a comedy night, casino, Karaoke, throw a dinner party for them and all of their many friends.
On a daily basis these folks will appreciate chatting, humour, being able to do their suduko, crosswords, ceramics or communicating via writing, emails or phone.
Venus in Cancer – Nurture them, show them you care by caring about them, Buy them food, then let them cook it! Let them decide where they want to go for their Birthday, it will probably be near some water or a Spa where they can be wrapped in blankets after a nice gentle massage.
On a daily basis these folks will appreciate space, time alone, not being asked to join in and you understanding their frequent mood phases. Always have their favourite snacks on hand.
Venus in Leo – Stand back, let them perform and enjoy the limelight, encourage their roar, throw them a party, make a fuss for any celebration, let everyone know it is a special occasion, sing Happy Birthday loudly and proudly, bring them a big cake and take lots of photos.
On a daily basis these folks will appreciate attention, compliments, generosity, recognition for anything that has been achieved that day and a reminder of their triumphs
Venus in Virgo – Show that you love them by doing helpful and practical things. On a special occasion take them to a play or organize a secret hike in a favourite area of theirs, take a well prepared picnic, maps and first aid.
On a daily basis these folks will appreciate you taking the rubbish out, doing the garden and those little jobs that have been on their minds.
Venus in Libra – Will enjoy any effort you make for special occasions. A performing arts event with music, a trip to a Gallery followed by gorgeous Afternoon Tea including champagne. There could be a line of friends wanting to bring them treats.
On a daily basis these folks will appreciate most things! Kindness, understanding, social connection and a beautiful home.
Venus in Scorpio – Take them to the cinema to watch a thriller, followed by a walk in some haunted woods. Organize an intense black and white photo shoot, complete with shiny blades, leather and some bare flesh.
On a daily basis these folks will appreciate privacy, penetrating conversations, intense emotions, hearing the truth of how you feel about them and yourself.
Venus in Sagittarius – Would get a kick from doing an Archery Workshop, book a Birds of Prey experience for a special occasion or go paint balling, cook some food outside whilst Glamping.
On a daily basis these folks will appreciate freedom, optimism, getting outdoors at the weekends and honesty. Support them in focusing on a hobby.
Venus in Capricorn – Ruled by Saturn, a big occasion isn’t a big occasion, let them do their invoices, file their documents, it is business as usual. If they have a specific hobby a book or related practical gift will suffice and a salad.
On a daily basis these folks will appreciate support for their serious ways, be there as part of the steadfast foundations of life.Knowing you are strong and reliable will be valued.
Venus in Aquarius – Come up with something unusual and unexpected, anything goes. Take them for a Gong Bath or the controversial show that is on in town, ideally they’d like to go sky diving during a lightning storm.
On a daily basis these folks will appreciate you giving them space to get on with things and lively, intelligent debate, allow them to push social boundaries and rebel.
Venus in Pisces – Take a flask and cuddle under a blanket while watching the Sunrise together, go for a boat trip down a river, play your Love songs, give them a foot massage, lie and watch the Stars.
On a daily basis these folks will appreciate romantic gestures, doing thing together, talking about the meaning of life, being stroked.
Good Luck with your seduction and loving your lover, there are many variables that come into play, however, a good eye to eye conversation on what each person would like always enhances the flow of Love.
The next article will look at Mars and the Sexual indicators in an Astrology Chart.
Diane H Cox
I get excited by pure creative process, powerfully unleashing the Unconscious with individualistic freedom, turning the board during the process, having no idea which way is ‘up’, the surprise of what flows through is thrilling, observing characters and forms of paints in unique, ingenious moments.
‘We All Heal” Oil, Enamel, Plaster on Board 24″x 24″
‘Secrets of the Maze‘ Oil, Acrylic and Plaster on Board 24″x 24″
‘Dancing in Darkness’ Plaster, oil, acrylic and metallic paints on Board 24″ x 24″
‘Journey to Venus‘ Oil and Acrylic on Board 24″ x 24″‘
‘Aspects of the Over Soul‘ Acrylic and Oil on Board 24″x 24″
‘Flight‘ Oil on Canvas 24″x 30
‘Leap of Faith’ Oil, Acrylic, Metallics and Plaster 24 x 24″
‘Balm of Gilead‘ Oil, Enamel and Acrylic on Board 24″x 24″
‘Strata Animo‘ Oil n Canvas 24″x 30″
‘Dreams of Bacchus’ Oil, Acrylic and Plaster on Board
‘Algiz’ Oil, Acrylic and Plaster on Board 24″ x 24″
‘Pool of Creation‘ Oil, Acrylic and Plaster on Board 24″ x 24″
‘Aditi – Mother of the Gods’ Oil on Board 24″ x 24″
‘Purify’ Oil, Acrylic and Plaster on Board 24″ x 24″
‘Saturn’s Love‘ Oil, Acrylic and Plaster on Board 24″ x 24″
‘Out of Light‘ Oil on Canvas 8″ x 8″
Paintings – Diane H Cox
If you could choose, what would be the perfect Death / Transformation / Changing Frequency Ceremony for you? What would be the last thing you’d want to hear, see, taste and smell as you passed from one frequency to another?
Transforming / Dying / Changing Frequency with a cube of chocolate melting in the mouth, a sip of great coffee, someone dabbing lips with a fine Sauvignon Blanc, listening to music that soothed, roused or rocked as you left.
Then again, the body may have gone beyond those desires, tired, worn out with long life, already detaching from the Human vehicle designed to embrace the rush of Earthly sensory delights, alternatively the circumstances may be speed, pounding dance music and instantaneous exit.
For why do we come to Earth? Isn’t it the ultimate buzz being in a body that can distinguish between the touch of a feather and a pinch, a bitter herb and sweet fruits, scent of roses, beautiful bird song, amble or to run, jump, swim and laugh. Being Human on Earth, the best ride in the Cosmic Adventure Park,
And all good (and bad) things come to an end.
All things are born to die, but do they? The misconception of Death, when it is merely being returned home to the Infinite Cosmic Flow, must surely be celebrated as ‘Birth’. The reverse of that, going from of being Pure Energy, Limitless Universal Flow, and then getting crammed into a small vessel called a baby, where Knowledge is temporarily wiped, along with your ability to walk and talk, appears to be more akin to voluntary confinement.
Energy inhabits these tiny bodies who are at the mercy of those around them, every word, action, sound, vibration, programming them. The lessons start day one, hour one, the frequent ‘Welcome to Earth’ ceremony involves being held upside down by the feet, smacked on the bum to cause crying and if they plan to stay around, breathing. It is not surprising some Energies immediately go back from where they came after that introduction to Human life.
Birth is a much anticipated event, cause for happiness and smiles, Death is not and society could be instantly improved if Death got the attention and Honour it commands.
Suffice to say, both entry and exit points to and from the Human vessel deserve planning, acknowledgement and as much contribution as the person in question desires. Even if it doesn’t exactly go that way at the time, the fact that a plan is in place and personal needs have been voiced, noted and acted upon, bestows comfort.
As Death is kept a secret from us, I think by our own design, it is a difficult thing to plan a ceremony for, many do get to organize their funeral which is useful. The readings, songs, photos or videos all salute the life lived.
The entry into the Human Vessel has finite timing, Birth can be predicted precisely, making planning easier! The procession of Ante and Post Natal Classes, baby showers, breathing techniques, water births, chanting, drumming or whatever takes your fancy, runs its course knowing arrival is imminent.
It could be that people are too ill, tired or in pain to engage in a Death / Transforming / Changing Frequency Ceremony, however, for a dying person to have planned hearing laughter, music, tales of their youth, the voices of relatives and grandchildren as they slipped from one World into the next could make for a very pleasant passing. For some it would be the absence of noise and people as they crossed over, just them, their thoughts, reflections and peace.
The feelings about the exit seem to be affected by the belief of what happens next, it is often heard the fear of Death is based on ‘The Unknown’, I think it is kept Unknown for a very pertinent reason, otherwise Humans would be jumping ship and going back to Limitless Universal Infinite Energy Flow and no-one would be left on Earth!
Illustration by Peter Bailey
There is a story about a Buddhist Monk and the reaction he had on observing a hearse drive by, on seeing the sight of the flower strewn coffin slowly passing by, he smiled and started to applause. The person with him gasped and asked him why he was doing such a thing as the solemn grieving relatives went by,
“Why, that person’s role in life has come to and end, their part in the play is over and it was a very good performance” grinning, the Monk happily continued on his way.
Yes, we are all performers in this play of ‘Life’. How do you like your role? Have you cast yourself as a villain? A star crossed lover? A Hero? A desk clerk, taxi driver, loner, party animal or all of the above at various times of the day?
Whatever your role it is, as valid an anyone’s, to take it a step further, if we consider that we have a big part in planning our Journey on Earth, such as the time and place we are born, the people we meet and the lessons we have signed up to learn, what if part of that ‘package’ is to organize our mode and time of exit / departure? How would it feel to know you had written the part of the play which stipulates how, where and when you leave it? You get to say if you go out in a blaze of glory or take your time, a slow walk off stage into the wings.
When we consciously think about it the automatic reaction is “No, no-one would ever choose to fall off a cliff, be bitten by a snake, shot or run over as a way of leaving life” But when you are out of a Human body and looking at the countless ways your Spirit Energy can be released from its Human vessel, well the options probably look rather exciting. It is not until you are inhabiting your Human vessel that the sensory input is realized and the mode you chose doesn’t seem so appealing now you are here! Good job our memories of planning our Human Journey are obscured once we are here on Earth. Akin to dreaming, we wake up and can’t remember dreams,, when we come here we often can’t remember being at one with the Universe and all it entails.
That mysterious moment where the Divine Spark enters matter within the Womb. It is the foetus that releases a hormone to begin the Birth process, the child instigates its own arrival, would it be outrageous to suggest we also initiate our own Death sequence? Obviously deeply unconscious, but something mystical encoded into our cells and Energy field, our personal ‘Change Frequency” button. If we come to Earth to study, to meet people who will teach us invaluable lessons, then it is possible we have a hand in designing our mode of Death.
Swami’s in the Himalayas and Monks from around the World know when they are going to leave their bodies, there are documented events of Divine Spirited people leaving their body at what appears to be a time of their choosing. They know they are going. Sitting up meditating, their Spirit drifting off serenely at the allocated time. When Yogananda’s Master, Swami Sri Yukteswar left his body he commented “The Lion has left his cage”. Our body, a temporary cage for the Infinite Divine Spark.
When in Pure Energy form, you are the Magical Force within the Ocean, Trees, Flowers, Plants, Stars and Skies, the push and pull of magnetic pulses and when in Human form you get to see yourself! People flock to Sunrise, Sunset, sitting by the Ocean, staring up at Starry skies, Humans are seeing the true essence of themselves from an astounding different point of view. My how astonishing we all are.
So, Cosmic Travellers, enjoy the huge after show party celebration, meeting with all the characters who played their part in your life and the effect you had in theirs, script on the floor, lines delivered well, laughing about who you disliked in the play and who you Loved, then sign on the dotted line for the next opportunity to come back in a newly designed role to do it all again!
The following is a transcript of my audio recording entitled ‘Comprehending Death, the Cycle of Regeneration and Transformation’ with a good amount of ‘Umm’, ‘ahhh’, ‘you know’ and gibberish edited out! (Link at the end of this transcript)
“The idea of coping with Death as a life skill, is born out of the fact that the majority of people live in the Shadow and fear of Death, and if we were only taught early on in life that Death is a transformation, Death is just a transforming from one state to another state, that could change.
If you believe that all there is is the tangible, the see-able, the touchable, and there is nothing after this tangible manifested earthy existence, then it s not surprising that people find it difficult. My friend used to say it doesn’t matter who you are, the King of Spain or the biggest high earning celebrity in the world, you know we all end up in box, that’s it, the end, finish, that’s it, you have this glorious life or not so glorious life and then we all end up in a box.
And I can understand therefore if you feel life isn’t going the way you think or it is not success, whatever that means, and then you die and end up in a box, yes it’s going to be a little bit traumatic to think you haven’t achieved and all you did was got up, sat in a traffic jam and served some government ideal and ended up in a box.
So there are many ways of thinking about this, if there was a thought of something more, the Energy that feeds the trees after the winter that move from bare branches into shoots, into leaves, into lemons, into almonds, into plums, into oranges, the stark cold earth that then comes up with wheat and vegetables and wonderful Earthy things that sustain our life.
If people just looked at the Earth in winter and said, “That’s it, it’s all over obviously, all the vegetables have gone to be in their own box, that’s it, the end. nothing s ever going to regenerate.” They would be severely mistaken.
You see this regeneration, what happens to those stark branches with nothing on them, the cold brown barren Earth, what happens when spring comes and everything starts to regenerate? What is that caused by? I always think it is so obvious that there is something else, something about life that is so magical and mystical but its all around us, it shows us that life continues, life carries on. The leaves come every year they are not the same leaves, they are different leaves and they fall off, they feed the Earth and something magical happens and they regenerate
So going back to the idea of Death if you feel that yes, you have your six score years and ten and then you end up in a box and that was it, that’s what life was about I can see how that can cause a little bit of disquiet if your life isn’t going the way you want.
If children were taught about this transformative process that we call Death right from the beginning, that OK, walking for instance could be considered Death, you come out you can’t walk or talk and you die to crawling, because you then begin to walk, you die to being unable to communicate with words and then you learn to speak, every day is a transformative process, every day something dies and something is reborn but if we look at Death as an end, a finality, then yes I think that is quite traumatic.
But if we take into consideration that when you die to crawling you learn to walk, that really is a very positive transformation, if you die to eating mashed up food and then start eating solid food, is that a terrible thing? Is that the end of it all, no everything is transforming, and I don’t know the person to credit this to but this idea that Energy never ends, Energy never ceases it just always transforms, nothing ever dies it just transforms into another state.
If children were taught that the minute they start to walk:
“Yay! Good for you, little Johnny has taken 4 steps today, yay, that is the Death of crawling! Woo Hoo!”
You know if that happened it would be a very different way of being
“Yay! Little Johnny has stopped eating liquids and he has some teeth and is eating solids, yay! That’s the Death of liquid food, woo hoo!”
It would transform it, so when a child experiences the Death of a person a physical person imagine if Death came around in the way of;
“Yay, woo hoo! Grandad has died to this kind of body and is kind of in a whole different place now, where he is everything and knows everything. He’s blended with the trees and the air and the clouds and the Sun and the Moon and the Stars, wow imagine the life Grandad is having”
But if you think that Grandad is now in a box and that’s the end of it all, withering away and decomposing, or put into the big fire and that’s it, it’s a very different thing.
(Even though these thoughts are valid and an important part of understanding the rituals around Death)
Of course, there is still the grieving process, the mourning, the loss, the feeling of the loss, the sadness of the loss . There is great healing in grieving thoroughly and feeling the loss, acknowledging the loss of the presence of a Being in your life that was really soul enhancing, warm, happy, joyful.
I do know of people that have been actually relieved at the loss of someone as a kind of closure of chapter, of… that’s it, the end, none of the Energy between us anymore that was fractious. The flip side is losing an Energy between another person who was extremely loving, giving and caring. So, of course yes, one always has to acknowledge grieving, loss and the mourning process.
There are cultures around the World who celebrate Death, transformation.
I went to a talk a while ago, it was about “Star Societies”, as they called them, I really loved it, “Star Societies” those Beings that don’t live on Earth. The whole idea that this Death thing that we call it, is just a change of frequency, which it actually obviously is. It’s like the film , ‘Men who stare at goats’, about the experiments of the US army in the 50’s, trying to get men to train to be able to run through walls, because there was all this knowledge they realized about changing frequency and vibration, you can actually blend with a tree, walk through walls, its all about a change of frequency, a change of vibration.
But this doom, fear based idea that it’s all just the end, you die and you end up feeding the worms, which is not such a bad thing to do, it’s like the trees, they feed us with oxygen every day, so, hey, what’s it to us that our body gives them a bit of nourishment.
But yes, I can understand why some people do feel that….. horror….. of going into the ground.
I really feel there is a place in the education system all over the World for this re-calibration and rethinking of what people call Death and really allowing people to cope with it.
One thing I have found about Death, dealing with people in a therapy situation is the terrible weight and burden people carry with regret. Someone dies, changes frequency, transforms and is no longer accessible to us in the physical form, that if they have regrets they never did the things they wanted to do, they left on bad terms, they hadn’t been speaking for years or the Death was a little bit traumatic, it leaves a stress, a trauma around it. Well the trauma can be healed, the trauma can be dealt with, but I do find people have been slowly destroyed by regret around Death.
It probably comes full circle to the point of…. well OK, lets live life with my relationships and the people around me that if they do die today, if something actually happens, my heart feels happy about where that relationships was. my heart feels good.
If you’ve had a fall out and someone has done you a wrong and you don’t want to be in connection with that person, you have to make sure you feel fine with it, you feel OK with it, I feel fine with that, I wish them all the best, I wish them every happiness but their Energy does not enhance my existence, I don’t wish them any harm and if they die tomorrow that’s fine, if I haven’t seen them or spoken to them, that s fine as long as they were happy and living the life they wanted, that’s fine. It doesn’t mean you have to be around people who don’t enhance your personal joy and freedom of Being.
I do think teaching children about that from a very young age, if they have done or said something where there is an unpleasantness and then someone transforms, changes frequencies, dies, whatever you want to call it, that they make sure they are in a state where everything is happy in their heart about that relationship, same with pets.
I think the life skill of coping with this would make life quite different, if people were taught how to cope with this constant event. If people were taught:
“Sweetheart you are dying every day, look yesterday you couldn’t tie the laces of your shoes and today you can!” It is a natural cycle.
And if children were closer to nature like some of them are, that obvious example in nature of everything regenerating, then I think coping with the Death of loved ones. they’d have a fighting chance of getting on with it, dealing with it and coping with it and going “Well this is natural”, and that is the whole thing this is natural, transformation is natural.
I don’t know who to credit this to, I have only heard Anthony Robbins say it “The one constant in life is change” Nothing stays the same, nothing stays unchanged and if children are taught that, everything’s changing, your hair changes, your skin changes we regenerate constantly. If this is taught, everything dies and is reborn or if you prefer regenerates, everything grows again, then the Shadow around Death would feel different.
The whole Death word even has a down kind of feeling whereas ‘the ultimate transformation’, ‘transforming’, ‘changing frequency’ is more, for me, accurate to what it actually is as opposed to Death, the grim reaper.
Of course unless you want to think about Death in the film ‘Meet Joe Black’ where Death is Brad Pitt who comes to your bedside and lays his hands on you and you pass from one form of existence into another. That can’t be all bad now can it?
If you are a man you can think of your own Transformative Angel coming to your bedside or wherever you are in order to make the transformation, and for me it is making the transformation home.
As Andreas Moritz said, Birth is the actual Death you come from being everything, the huge expansion of Energy knowing everything, being in touch with everything, feeling this huge infinite energetic way of being and then your Spirit gets born into this tiny body that can’t speak or walk or do anything for itself, no wonder babies cry, because you’ve suddenly found yourself actually in a box , ha ha which is quite funny, actually in a box in the form of a human body, a very, very, very small human body, that’s the actual Death. And you have your time on Earth and learn the lessons you wanted to learn, you cross paths with the people that have agreed to teach you some very specific learnings you wanted to learn and they can be very unpleasant or very pleasant and then you transform back into this wonderful big I AM, the everything, the Infinite Intelligence that is Life and Death and Ultimate Transformation.”